Love Your Life!!!

Seeing with eyes of Baby Love

I am probably revealing this a little too early, but I can’t resist it – I just found out that I am going to be an aunt for a second time!!!  I already have a niece, Morgan, who is utterly adorable!  She will be 2 in May, and she is my li’l puddin’ pants! ;o)  Here is one of my favorite pictures of her when she was much younger:

When my sister, Karen, told me that she is going to have another baby (due date is September 11), I thought that my heart was going to explode with love!!  I could literally feel waves of loving energy being directed from me toward this baby.  Isn’t it strange how quickly you can develop deep feelings of love for a being who is barely the size of a kidney bean??

Then I started to wonder – what is it that causes us to love babies so much, and why don’t we have these same excited feelings of love toward most of the adults that we meet?  I know that my feelings of love in this instance may be connected to the fact that this child is related to me by blood, but, believe me, I am pretty gaga about babies in general.  To me, all babies are beautiful for reasons that I don’t think I can fully explain.  Maybe it is their innocence, purity, their tiny hands and toes, or any other number of characteristics combined.

But I come back to the question – why don’t we appreciate adults in the same way?  Why don’t we look at our friends, strangers, the elderly, the bank teller, the grocery bagger, and send them loving thoughts just for being who they are, just because they exist?

I don’t know exactly what the answer is, but I suspect that it has to do with our adult judgments, judgments that push us to reject ourselves and to reject other people.  We have concepts and beliefs that we have developed over time about what is beautiful and what is not. 

What I do know in my heart is that everyone is worthy of the love that we give to babies.  Everyone is worthy of love simply because they are here on this earth.  People we don’t know, even people we don’t like, are beautiful in their existence.  Many times, we either consciously or unconsciously choose not to see it.

So, today, I am going to try to see everyone that I encounter today through the eyes of “baby love.”  I want to be aware of the people around me, to truly see and appreciate the wonder and beauty of each person that crosses my path.  I hope that I can encourage you to do the same!

Everyone should have a dream!

 
Photo courtesy of Tom Schmucker/Swivel-Eye Photo

I was at a party on Friday night where the topic of visiting Hawaii came up a couple of times.  It made me think of a post that I wrote right about this time last year on a different blog that I just couldn't seem to make work.  Anyway, I couldn't resist re-posting this -- today I am appreciating the importance of always having some big, concrete dreams in life!!!

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When I was almost 21 years old, in January 1990, I was reading my tiny hometown newspaper, and a story caught my eye: "Hawaii beckons to couples seeking a special hideaway." The article went on to describe Kona Village Resort on the big island of Hawaii as one of the most romantic wedding and honeymoon destinations in the world. I was so enthralled with this article that I cut it out of the paper, dated it, and put it in my scrapbook. I so wanted to see the "ancient lava flows, lush lagoons, and swaying palms" that were described, and I particularly wanted to stay in one of the "plush, thatched-roof 'hales'" that make up the resort. I would DREAM about going there often when I was in my early 20s.

Well, now I am almost 40, and after awhile, I forgot about the Kona Village Resort and my dream to go there someday. But, then, on a visit to Richmond, VA last month, I was reading a copy of Islands Magazine that I found in a coffee shop, and there it was again -- Kona Village Resort was listed as one of the 10 most romantic island getaways. I, of course, devoured the story. It made me feel so happy, like running into an old friend that you haven't seen in years and you realize how much you missed her.

I missed Kona Village Resort. When I got home from Richmond, I dug out the 1990 article that I had saved all of these years, and I fell in love with the resort all over again. A trip there will not be easy on your wallet, but if you want to dream along with me, take a look at:

http://www.konavillage.com/

The way I see it, everyone has to have at least a few good dreams in life. I just made going to Kona Village Resort one of mine (again!!)
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Script & Scribble: The Rise and Fall of Handwriting

Photo courtesy of Tom Schmucker/Swivel-Eye Photo

Today, I am celebrating handwriting (yes, that's right, I am appreciating cursive writing!)for a couple of reasons.  The first reason is that I have decided to make sending handwritten notes and letters a bigger part of my life in 2009.  When I was a kid, I LOVED writing letters.  I had numerous pen pals across the country, courtesy of the 1970s television show, Big Blue Marble.  I never really knew if my pen pals enjoyed reading the correspondence as much as I liked writing it, but once I started, I was hooked!!

Some of the pen pal relationships fizzled out fairly quickly (not due to any lack of enthusiasm on my part, the other person lost interest first!).  But, in some cases, the relationships lasted for years.  The longest pen pal relationship I ever had was with a girl named Gentry Lane who lived all the way out in exotic California.  I actually went so far as to call her once on her birthday (I love celebrating birthdays), but eventually we lost touch, and once I graduated from college, I stopped writing letters all together.

Lately, I have been trying to make some significant changes in my life.  I have been specifically asking myself a question that I haven’t directly contemplated in quite some time -– What brings me joy in life?  When I come up with something that I think would truly bring me joy, I then try to think of ways to fit the activity into my life.  I recently remembered how much I used to love sending letters to my friends and waiting with anticipation to receive a letter in return.  In my letters, I would go on and on about the minutiae of my daily existence, and I miss seeing the stories of my life in vivid detail on paper. 

When is the last time that you received a handwritten note or letter through the regular ol’ snail mail??  Your birthday?  Christmas, maybe??  It doesn’t happen much anymore in this email, Facebook, and Twitter driven world, and I think that’s a shame.  Wouldn’t it be fantastic to get a letter from a friend in the mail??

I think it would be, which is why I am bringing the handwritten letter back into my life!  If you are a friend of mine, you should be expecting to receive some written correspondence from me this year!

I am not really sure why I didn’t think of bringing the handwritten letter back sooner, given the fact that one of my jobs is working as a handwriting analyst.  Which brings me to my second reason for celebrating handwriting – it is a very special day for me because I am being featured as a contributor to a book that is being released today (it’s National Handwriting Day!).  The book, written by Kitty Burns Florey, is entitled Script & Scribble: The Rise and Fall of Handwriting.  Kitty is also the author of Sister Bernadette’s Barking Dog, which was named one of the “Best Books of 2006” by Slate magazine.  Kitty asked me and a couple of other graphologists to analyze a few handwriting samples for a chapter of the book that discusses handwriting analysis.  My contribution to the book is quite small, but it was still a HUGE honor for me to be asked to participate in Kitty’s latest endeavor.  I am extremely thrilled to be a part of this book!!!

If handwriting has played an important part in your life, I would love to hear about it!  Also, if you are so inclined, you might want to think about sending a handwritten note to someone who is important in your life.  Let that person know how much he or she means to you -- I'm sure that your gesture would be appreciated!!!

The Happiness Project

 

Laughing Buddha -- Photo courtesy of Tom Schmucker/Swivel-Eye Photo

Today, I am appreciating a blog that I recently discovered – it’s the Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin.  I learned of Gretchen’s blog because she just started writing a column for Slate magazine. 

As I see it, happiness is closely connected to appreciation.  I believe that paying attention to and appreciating yourself and the circumstances surrounding your life can lead to greater and greater levels of happiness.

I am particularly enthralled with Gretchen’s idea of breaking your goals down into smaller steps and then holding yourself accountable for completing those steps.  By taking small consistent steps toward your goals, you can produce real, lasting change.  This is certainly not a new idea, but I like the chart that Gretchen has come up with to help measure, on a daily basis, the small steps that she is taking to create her dreams.  You can email Gretchen to get a copy of her chart (I did!) or you can email me at lifeappreciation@gmail.com, and I would be happy to forward Gretchen’s chart to you!

I am hoping that you will visit the Happiness Project for some tips and other great information!

Let It Snow!!!

Today, there is SO much to appreciate!!! (There will be MANY exclamation points!!!)  For starters, it snowed here in Raleigh last night!  It literally hasn’t snowed in years!!  Having been raised in the Northeast, I miss not having any snow at all here in the South.  So today is a real treat for me.  I love a good snowfall -- it makes the world seem more beautiful and absolutely more peaceful.   It brings me great joy!!  Here are some pictures of our snowy backyard:

 

Also, here is a picture of Max debating whether or not he wanted to venture out into the snow:

He eventually did go out, but it didn’t last long!

 

The other great thing about today is that the snow got me a day off from Legal Aid.  Normally, this would be pretty wonderful on its own ;o), but the timing really was auspicious because it allowed me to watch the inauguration and all the festivities in their entirety at home!  It has been absolutely fantastic to be able to witness such a historical day!

Today truly is a magical day – a day filled with beauty, and hope, and LOVE!!!!

Thought for the day

"Life's most persistent and urgent question is, 'What are you doing for others?'"
- Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

16 Things About Me

Self-portrait, Montalcino, Italy

I came across this idea of sharing 16 things about yourself on a couple of blogs this week –  Taking Flight, Ordinary Courage, and Airy Nothings.   I think that this idea fits really well into the appreciation blog because, if you do this exercise, it gets you to acknowledge and appreciate some of the things that make you YOU.  You are unlike any other person on the planet, and I think that we should all take the time to focus on and celebrate the qualities that make us unique, even if we think that some of our qualities are less than desirable.  That having been said, here are 16 things that make me ME (the good, the bad, and the ugly ;o) ):

1.  I love to dance.  I don’t do much dancing in public anymore (this New Year’s Eve was the recent exception – thanks Gina!!), but I absolutely love to dance around the house.  The only thing that I can ever remember wanting to be as a child was a dancer.  I’ve never had a dance class in my life, but I still dream about doing a one-woman interpretive dance performance in public!

2.  I collect refrigerator magnets from places that I travel to – the cheesier the better!  Some of my friends know this and have taken to giving us magnets as gifts.  My friend Susan is the current holder of the Cheesiest Magnet Gift award.

3.  I am a reluctant participator on Facebook.  I don’t really like it that much, and I want to stop using it, but a couple of my friends use it so much that I feel like I will miss out on what is going on in their lives if I stop visiting.

4.  I usually feel disappointed on my birthday.  This is the one day of the year where I want to be noticed, but I never get the level of attention that I want deep down inside.  A few of the people closest to me have difficulty either remembering exactly when my birthday is or finding the time to acknowledge it, which doesn’t help! (no offense to anyone who falls into this category, I know you love me!  :o) )

5.  I know TONS of lyrics from songs from the 80s.  I know, you’re probably thinking – I do too – but seriously, I know tons, TONS of lyrics.  I spent way too much time listening to the radio and watching tv as a child.

6.  I am a sappy romantic at heart.  One of my all time favorite movies is The Sound of Music.  Enough said.

7.  I hate the taste of black licorice and celery.

8.  Even though I ADORE children, I have never wanted to have my own.  This has often made me feel like I don’t fit into society.

9.  I am still very close to my ex-husband.  I am very proud of this relationship, but I don’t think that many of my friends understand it, so I don’t talk about it too much.

10.  I love, love, love to incorporate lines from A Charlie Brown Christmas special into every day conversation.  Whoever wrote that show is a genius - it has the best dialogue ever!!!  Two of my very favorite sayings are – “All I want is what I have coming to me.  All I want is my fair share.” And “I know when I’ve been insulted . . . I know when I’ve been insulted.” 

11.  On a somewhat similar note . . . . This one is particularly embarrassing to admit, and I really only say them around Tom, but I make up my own nonsensical exclamatory phrases that I use in different circumstances.  So instead of saying Wow! or Yikes! I might say things like Ooofen Boofen! and Ach du leeb!

12.  I don’t wear makeup – none, zero, ever.  What you see is what you get!

13.  For my entire adult life, I have struggled, almost on a daily basis, with how to make a living.  I am extremely envious of people who have always known what they wanted to do in life.  I have tried several different career paths, but I cannot seem to find my passion.  It is frustrating and disheartening.

14.  I have never been to Disney World.

15.  I am all about cute!  It’s hard to be specific about this one, but I am a sucker for just about anything that can be labeled as “cute” – baby animals, baby clothes, kids toys, anything with a smiley face on it, etc.  Hopefully you get the picture!

16.  I check my email a gazillion times a day.  I couldn’t live without a computer!

This was actually more difficult to do that I thought it would be.  Putting this out in the blogosphere makes me feel a little vulnerable and exposed, so I know that there was value in this exercise!  I obviously still have a lot of work to do on learning how to appreciate myself!!!

Cupcakes!

Does anyone out there share my love of cupcakes?!  I think that they are simply fantastic!  In my mind, a cupcake is a thing of beauty – a perfect portion all unto itself.

In 2008, I discovered the magic of companies that will make individualized cupcakes for you.  I realized that a distinctive cupcake can make a great gift for family and friends, whether for a birthday or some other special occasion.  It is a very cute way of showing that you care, and an unusual cupcake always draws attention!

Here are two cupcakes that I had made last year.  The first was for my friend Kelly’s birthday:

 

 

The second was a cupcake that I had made for Tom when we ran the Cincinnati Flying Pig marathon in May.  The design was based on the pig that is featured on the race website:

 

Both cupcakes were made by Cupcake Envy in Wake Forest, NC.  I promised Cupcake Envy a shout-out on the blog awhile back – my apologies for just getting around to it now!  Check out their website – I was tremendously pleased with the work that they did and with their fantastic customer service!  You can even order from Cupcake Envy if you live outside North Carolina -- shop online here.

Today it feels really great to appreciate one of the little pleasures in life!!!!

Beach Bliss

Photo courtesy of Tom Schmucker/Swivel-Eye Photo

On a cold day like today in Raleigh, I often find myself thinking about an escape to somewhere where there is a beach and a warm breeze.  I am absolutely in love with the ocean.  My biggest dream in life is to own a beach house.  I realize that it is not a very practical dream, with environmental factors like beach erosion, but I just can’t help myself!!  I love everything about being at the beach – the sound of the waves crashing on the shore, searching for shells, leafing slowly through magazines while sitting under an umbrella, even getting sand all over me!  And I LOVE to boogie board!!!

A shell I found in St. Augustine

When I look out at the ocean, sometimes it makes me feel very small, which makes me realize my place in the universe and makes me aware of the fact that whatever problems I may be experiencing in life are quite minor in the grand scheme of things.  Other times when I look over the ocean, I am awed by the majesty and the beauty of it, which provides me with a feeling of expansion and makes me believe that anything is possible.  Being at the ocean is like magic for me -- it is the one place in the world I can go where I know I will experience a feeling of peace. . . .

I encourage you to spend just a few minutes today thinking about a place that is dear to your heart and appreciating it for how it makes you feel when you are there!!

Essential Oils

 

Photo copyright Tom Schmucker/Swivel-Eye Photo

As you know, I have made it a goal of mine to appreciate my life as much as possible.  But, if you have read the very first post that I made to this blog, you know that appreciating life is not always an easy thing for me to do.  Sometimes I fall back into my old, engrained habits of negativity, sometimes I truly do have a bad day, or sometimes I just don’t feel like being appreciative – there is a strange sort of comfort to wallowing in my misery!!

When I am feeling like this, the first step is, of course, to be aware of the way that I am feeling.  Then, I try my best to take whatever steps I can to slowly shift my mood, change my feelings, etc., no matter how small those steps might be.  One simple technique that I often like to use to assist me in making this shift is the burning of essential oils, which is also known as aromatherapy.

Essential oils are different from perfumes, air fresheners, fragrance oils, etc.  Essential oils are obtained from a wide assortment of plants, which have been steam distilled or cold-pressed from flowers, fruit, bark and roots.  Many people believe that the use of essential oils can help ease a wide assortment of ailments; easing aches, pains, and injuries, while relieving the discomforts of many health problems. Aromatherapy also acts on the central nervous system, relieving depression and anxiety, reducing stress, relaxing, uplifting, sedating or stimulating, restoring both physical and emotional wellbeing.

There are many companies that you can buy essential oils from, and they are also often sold in grocery store chains like Whole Foods, EarthFare, etc.  I use the Aura Cacia brand, which is less expensive than other brands, but still produces good results.  I generally burn the oils in a diffuser, which you can generally find in the same places that you buy the essential oils.  I would recommend using a metal diffuser if you can find one.  Many of the diffusers you can find in stores are made at least partially of glass, and they generally crack over time due to the heat that they are subjected to.

You can use different oils to help create different moods.  One of my favorites is lavender, which helps to calm and relax the nervous system.  I also really like to use clary sage for times when I am feeling emotionally out of balance.  Juniper berry oil can help to energize you , and orange oil can help to brighten your mood.  There really is a wide variety of oils to experiment with!

So today, I am appreciating this small step that I can take to shift my mood when I am feeling non-appreciative.  If you have any mood-shifting tips that you would like to share, we would appreciate it!